Roxanna Bikadoroff, Author at ROXANNA BIKADOROFF

February 26, 2021April 10, 2024

Moon Sign Musings

It’s a Full Moon in Virgo, trining Uranus in Taurus. The Moon holds memories and Uranus can bring up very distant ones, from past lifetimes, but also future or parallel lives, since Uranus is not bound by Saturn timelines. Taurus is romantic, loves ancestry and Virgo loves to record and categorize. So let’s gaze into the crystal, Full Moon ball for clues to each sign’s lunar history…

Moon in Aries

Moon of mythic heroes and epic, battle sagas.
Yours is an ancient soul lineage of indigenous warriors or Amazons, thus combat is in your blood and likely your mother’s.
Patrick Henry’s immortal slogan, “Give Me Liberty or Give Me Death” was first uttered on March 23, 1775, Aries season.
In Valhalla (Old Norse: Valhöll – “hall of the slain”), the Moon is always in Aries. Valkyries are your guardian angels.
You are nurtured by taking initiative, protecting life and being honored for your deeds.

Moon in Taurus

Crescent Moon, crescent horns of an Egyptian Bull

The Hathor Moon of milk and honey, that which the sacred cow jumped over. When people say ‘as old as the Moon’ they are talking about the Taurus Moon.
When the sensual, hoofed beauties of the first lunar calendars were painted in caves, to when the first Goddess temples were built, to the Golden Age of Egypt, you were there, worshiping and being worshiped. But your one, constant temple is nature itself.
You are nurtured by gentle breezes carrying the scent of Spring green, good food and sound sleeps.

Moon in Gemini

The Bardic Moon, the inconstant Moon of Romeo and Juliet and Courtly Love. By listening intently to the chattering of birds, you developed language, and later, writing, in order to describe the complexities of human emotion.
Like Cyrano, your words were often commissioned by enamored knights, to whom you generously offered delivery service. Your (in)famous dexterity was honed picking chastity belt locks by candlelight.
You are nurtured by your other half and by imagining things into being.

Moon in Cancer

The Moon of the Great Mother Ocean, conductor of tidal movements and the cycles of rebirth.
Also the keeper of memories, hence Mnemosyne, mother of the 9 Muses.
Yours is a matriarchal cult that precedes temples, when Lucy walked the shores of Africa, nursing Monkey Jesus. You’ve never forgotten a single one of your infinite children (or loves) and hug them all to your breast, when full.
You are nurtured when cooking soul food for your tribe and by being in sync with the colour of your moods.

Moon in Leo

The Dramatic Moon, Cybele’s Moon.
In the Mountain Lion Mother’s temple, you took part in orgiastic rituals, as her half-wild attendants beat drums and danced, while ecstatic devotees offered their self-severed testicles.
You have never forgotten such scenes of devotion, and, while you don’t expect blood offerings these days, you’d still appreciate the occasional drum roll, upon entering a room, thank you very much.
You are nurtured by the self-confidence you feel when giving and receiving creative encouragement.

Moon in Virgo

The Isis or Holy Mother Moon, Moon of witches, healers and midwives.
In the distant past, some of you were responsible for keeping records, including the cycles, names and many uses of plants, others, for libations and purification rituals. Later, in the age of ‘enlightenment’, the first group went on to study medicine, while the others chose a life of the cloth, continuing to serve the Holy Mother, under a different guise.
You still like pure food and being on both first and Latin name terms with the plants in your garden, where you are nurtured and grounded by making improvements…so your cats say.

Moon in Libra

The Manna Moon, and Moon of Temperance.
Your lineage introduced the concept of ‘fairness’ as well as the legalities around trade, marriage and other civilities, based on what was later understood as karma, or, in olde Egypt, the Weighing of Hearts.
Ever since your Greek days, you have been dividing the Gods and Goddesses of your psyche, assigning to each a chord or rhythm and trying different combinations, listening carefully for harmony and discord. You are nurtured by finding the harmonic ones, in all areas of life.

Moon in Scorpio

Hekate’s Moon, Moon of sorcery and shamanic healing.
The casting and removal of hexes is in your soul lineage.
In your own illness, you flew to the land of the dead and back, thus were selected to preside over this transition – be it by returning there, entranced, to retrieve lost souls, preparing the dead, or guiding the deceased towards rebirth.
The elite of your tribe wrote the manuals (The Tibetan and Egyptian Books, for example), while those on the ground practiced midwifery or donned the anonymous, black hood. Residual, last words of the condemned still echo, occasionally, so these days you try to focus on the rebirth part.
Nocturnal animals are your familiars and deep, healing love, your nurturing tonic.

Moon in Sagittarius

The Artemis-Diana Moon, former gypsy, nomad, traveler, with lifetimes of stories to draw from.
You are a semi-retired Sindbad who continues armchair time-traveling to communicate with yourself, in long ago and far away places.
Like Chiron, you are nurtured by nature, freedom and independence, as well as learning and seeking. “Don’t fence me in” is your motto, yet you ultimately seek that place to call home.
You forgive but you don’t forget, because why would you leave out any part your life’s novel ?

[My own lineage, Moon of my mother, both maternal grandparents, aunt and some of my cousins on her side, as well as my paternal grandfather and aunt!]

Moon in Capricorn

The Druid Moon or Pan Moon, the old, wise one, behind the scenes power mover, shaker, money maker, who knows the inner workings of the outer world and how to keep persona and personal separate.
Like your Stonehenge ancestors, you rarely, if ever, divulge your secrets, and distrust all sycophants or anyone offering a free lunch, for that matter.
Somewhere in your past, you were the scapegoat, and that fear still haunts your memory.
You are nurtured by the finer things in life and may have a dark or gallows sense of humour.

Moon in Aquarius

The cosmic crystal (frozen fire) Moon, holding all the resonance codes of creation.
In your telepathic lineage, communication is equal between all lifeforms. You may be/have been one of the extra-terrestrials advancing our technology in preparation for the Aquarian Age.
You have emotions, it’s just that you find them too heavy for communicating through time and space and one can’t bend spoons with them. Also, because electricity travels faster and is more deadly in water, you are wary of electrocuting others should your emotions get the better of you.
You are nurtured by freeing minds.

Moon in Pisces

The Mystic Moon, where imposed, grid time and other boundaries seem like drag nets.
Long ago, when the water dried up and left you in the middle of a desert, you began walking (or dancing) the mystical path, in bare feet and have never stopped.
Nurtured by that which glimmers, you understand we are living in an illusion, but most people don’t know how to and you can’t bear to watch them suffer. You are frequently late, since your clock is melting and crawling with ants, but the love you give more than makes up for it.

***

Written content copyright © Roxanna Bikadoroff and may not be reproduced in full or in part without permission.
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February 19, 2021August 19, 2024

The Hermit and Isolation

“The Greek word erēmia is in turn rooted in erēmos, meaning desolate. While a certain bleak emptiness can accompany unsought solitude, there is solace to be found even so. As Chesterton observed in that same essay of his: “It is in society that men quarrel with their friends; it is in solitude that they forgive them.” The word itself dates back to the 12th Century, and comes from the Greek word erēmia, meaning desert, a big clue to its religious roots. Paul of Thebes is widely regarded as the first hermit, fleeing anti-Christian persecution and a scheming relative to exist alone in the Egyptian desert from the age of 13 to his death in the year 314, aged 113.

“Look to other cultures, and you’ll find that even early Buddhism’s chaste female wanderers, for example, were exceptions to the rule. Like the Hermit card in Tarot decks, we picture them male. In literature, the woman who opts for isolation tends to be at best a figure of pity, at worst, something more malevolent.

“Finally, one of history’s rarer female hermit voices, the Christian mystic Julian of Norwich – who lived through the Black Death as a child and survived serious illness in adulthood – provides words to which we all, believers, agnostics and atheists alike, might cling: “All shall be well, and all shall be well and all manner of thing shall be well.””

source: article by Hephzibah Anderson, BBC
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20200417-what-hermits-can-teach-us-about-isolation

January 30, 2021October 20, 2023

Queen of the Night – An Orientalist Fantasy in Sequins

This post is about the inspiration and research behind the first in a series of three tapestries, which has it’s own art page, here. I have Black Moon Lilith and Moon on the ascendant, at the same degree, so astrologically speaking, she’s always ‘in my face’, a topic of much speculation, creativity and learning.

sequinned tapestry of Queen of the Night, in black, white and silver — LILIMOTH

Initially, I’d wanted to create something that commented on the US invasion of Iraq. But beyond the political, the psychological motivation behind it seemed to be a continuation of an orientalist, biblical fantasy, mythologized on the silent screen by stars like Rudolf Valentino and Theda Bara. Muse of William Fox (Fox Studios), Theda’s stage name was an anagram for ‘Arab Death’ and the legend was that she had been born under the Sphinx. In reality she was a Jew from Cincinnati, Theodosia Burr Goodman…but maybe her first name carried some karmic, Byzantine resonance. My grandparents adored her, and so do I.

Vamps: Philip Burne-Jones, Theda Bara and the Burney Relief (British Museum)

Fun fact: a direct lineage can be traced from Dracula to Fox News. Bram Stoker’s novel was published in 1897, same year as Queen Victoria’s Diamond Jubilee. Kipling wrote two famous poems that year; Recessional (‘lest we forget’ – a warning about hubris, not a requiem) and The Vampire, based on his cousin Philip Burn-Jones’ painting of a lady Vampire. The latter became the script for the 1915 silent film ‘A Fool There Was – a Psychological Drama‘ starring Theda Bara as the Vamp, and the rest is history. Hollywood’s reigning succubus made Fox a fortune, and although the studio changed hands a few times over the decades, the news network still bears his name.

I had spent a number of years as an orientalist, myself, belly dancing in San Francisco, where, while American troops pillaged Bagdhad’s treasures, show biz promoters at home were busy recreating and selling Arab culture in their own name, just like in the good old days. It was disturbing to learn that some of the players and financiers behind the invasion believed that the actual Garden of Eden was located around Baghdad somewhere and needed reclaiming. Oil was only part of the story, Saddam was busy rebuilding Babylon on perceived christian turf at a prophetically critical time (imperialist rulers had long ago pillaged the originals, so he was recreating them) – oh no he didn’t. Patriarchs fighting over ownership of the Goddess’ terrain, what else is new?

Further, looking to nature for older, mythical memories, the Death’s Head Hawk Moth struck a chord. Acherontia atropos is the most popular of the three species, due to her pronounced skull marking and subsequent appearances in literature and film (such as the Silence of the Lambs). She lives primarily in the Middle East:

The species names atropos, lachesis and styx are all from Greek myth and related to death. The first refers to the member of the three Moirai who cuts the threads of life of all beings; the second to the Moira who allots the correct amount of life to a being; and the last refers to the river of the dead. In addition the genus name Acherontia is derived from Acheron, a river of Greek myth that was said to be a branch of the river Styx. [Wikipedia]

Turns out this little Moira of the night shares attributes with our lady Screech Owl (Lilith), such as, well, screeching (or rather, squeaking):

“However, let the cause of the noise be what it may, the effect is to produce the most superstitious feelings among the uneducated, by whom it is always regarded with feelings of awe and terror.”
~ Edward Newman, mid 19th century entomologist [ibid]

Have a listen to the cutest ‘I am the night’ ever, here.

Like Lilitu, who were thought to steal babes from their cradles, Acherontia steals honey from beehives by mimicking their scent. Her larva feast on nightshades, the accumulative affect of toxic alkaloids making them poisonous – perhaps formulating the distinct skull marking on the adult moth.

Medium being the message, I put away my paper and charcoal, and took out my unused, belly dance costuming supplies. Religious icons require materials that reflect light, be it glass, gold, movie screen or – why not? – sequins. Then I remembered having been blown away by a show of sequinned, Haitian Vodou Drapo (flags) in Montreal, some years prior, and that sealed it.

Lilimoth was completed in 2008. The second piece, Medusun, in 2009. The third piece, Anathemia, in 2022. This is a 3 part blogpost, so do read the other 2 to learn more!

All written content herein (except quotations), images of Lilimoth tapestry and Theda sketch are ©Roxanna Bikadoroff and may not be reproduced anywhere without my permission. You may share the post via link.

January 20, 2021January 7, 2023

A poem for Mars conjunct Uranus by William Ernest Henley (1875)

Invictus

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds and shall find me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate,
I am the captain of my soul.

* * *

January 11, 2021May 24, 2024

Election Vivisection Redux

And when he came to the place where the wild things are
they roared their terrible roars and gnashed their terrible teeth
and rolled their terrible eyes and showed their terrible claws
till Max said “BE STILL!”
and tamed them with a magic trick
of staring into their yellow eyes without blinking once
and they were frightened and called him the most wild thing of all
and made him king of all wild things
“And now,” cried Max, “let the wild rumpus start!”

~ from ‘Where the Wild Things Are’ by Maurice Sendak

Below are excerpts from two articles from my old blog archives. I was not going to include them – or any political posts – in this new site, but under the circumstances, it’s kind of interesting now, to see the writing on the wall. The summation for me was Patti Smith singing ‘A Hard Rain’s A-Gonna Fall’ at the Nobels, after the dictator won the election in 2016. The sinking feeling we’d all had foreshadowed so much that has befallen us since, but the song is hopeful at the end.
(Photos of the subject have been removed, as well as his full name, because we’ve seen quite enough).

Monday, March 14, 2016 – Triumph of the Donald

Why do I get the feeling, when I witness DT, that he is a man in great pain, begging to be put out of his misery ?

Geminis often make great actors, because of their channeling abilities, as long as they can consciously take the persona off at the end of the day. Gemini Marilyn Monroe was an example of one who could not. Having ‘no there, there’ can be scary, feel empty.
One of the more serious conditions a non-conscious or un-grounded Gemini can suffer from is demon or spirit possession, because, being mutable air they are often not quite in their bodies, and being Mercurial, even the less shadowy twins can sometimes attract invisible friends, conjuring unawares. Demons eat negativity and when they find a host, they encourage more and more of it in them, to feast on, as was the case with Gemini Rob Ford, former mayor of Toronto.

Similarly, DT is getting more bloated and insane and less in control of his words and actions. He is not on crack, though I am not sure about pharmaceuticals. At the same time, because of the path he’s taken, he has no choice but to see it through, high stakes, winner take all. Speculative Sagittarius Moon opposite his Gemini Sun. DT has Uranus (higher octave of Mercury) conjunct Sun and opposite Moon. Uranus here bestows an obstinate self-centeredness, extreme unpredictability and the courage of one’s own convictions, no matter how crazy. Monotony is anathema, therefore the pot must always be stirred. With Moon opp Uranus, the soul is never at rest and the person cannot be happy living in the present. The need for intensity eventually can wear them out. I think he is worn out, but his demons are keeping him hopped up and he likes the mojo. And Mercury square Neptune can be delusional.

America loves Uranus, because it’s the planet of Aquarius, society at large, freedom, revolution, the rebel without a cause, wild at heart, as well as science and technology, discovery. But it’s unpredictability has a dark side, too – energetic forces that we don’t know how to control, nukes, big pharma, genetic engineering, and internet disinformation that flows like spilled water. Any planets close to the Sun want their place in the Sun, they’re ‘hot’, so I think his Uranus (insert Uranus joke here) is what people notice first and foremost…certainly that ‘shock’ of hair. His followers feel oppressed by ‘political correctness’ and see him as their liberator.

It’s funny, because mythological Uranus was no liberator. And we now know Uranus, like Saturn, has rings, so even though it marches to a different drummer, it is not entirely unconstrained by limitations. In any case, DT’s North Node lies right smack between his Sun and Uranus, so there’s a destiny to fulfill, for better or worse, and it’s tied in with his aggressive, lonely, Leo Mars ego in the 12th house of karmic debt and self-undoing. The 12th house is where one seeks to dissolve ‘me’ and devote to higher ideals, to transcend ego and free oneself from residue of past deeds. Pluto is also in Leo, there (if his birth time is correct), at 10 degrees. The Pluto-Leo generation have issues and past guilt around things like privilege and wealth, lording it over others. It’s the rock star/super star Baby Boomer bunch. Many of them worked through their karma on stage, through performance. Well, America has had an actor for president before…

Giansar is the fixed star conjunct DT’s Pluto, in the tail of Draco. It indicates having many friends and an analytical mind, but also the name means ‘the punished enemy’ as well as ‘the poison place’, because it is similar in nature to the south node (Dragon’s tail). He may very well be re-living a past life of being a punished dictator. Royal star Regulus, Heart of the Lion aka ‘Little King’, is right smack on his ascendant, conjunct Mars by a few degrees, meaning he sees himself – and others may see him – as a ruthless king. Well, he certainly does live like royalty.
The fixed stars around his Sun have to do with high position, quick mind, quick temper, luck, brief fame, scandal, quarrels, weapons of war, point of attack and the Death card in Tarot. (I think of stars as being indicative of the past, because their light has come from there, reaching us in the present and lighting particular points of the chart).

Mussolini was Leo Sun w Gemini Pluto, in mutual reception to DT’s Gemini Sun and Leo Pluto.

Thursday, October 27, 2016
Election Vivisection

Watching parts of the last presidential debate made me physically nauseous for about three days. Both candidates are frightening, but I think DT is actually, literally toxic, a product of all the psychological hazardous waste in the US, having taken on a life form.

It’s hard to say who was doing exactly what last time around, but 1938 keeps coming up again and again. The players have changed, but the cycle has come back to the same spot. Fun fact – H.G. Wells’ War of the Worlds was first broadcast Oct 30, 1938, causing widespread panic, because Orson Welles made it sound so realistic. The first large scale example, perhaps, of how collective fear could be manipulated by media. (Aptly, it was a Mercury Theatre production). We are seeing that every day now, but nobody is coming on air after the fact to tell us that it’s not real !

I’m not the only one who thinks there will be a plot twist to this election. Some think there will be an assassination or attempt on either candidate, most predict some kind of voting fraud or mishap. I think it will come after the election, whether it be assassination, health-related or some criminal allegation. Not sure, just know that the actual election is not going to be the end of this madness, just a point of release.

Looking to 1938 again, there were a few very false starts, like when Hitler was named TIME Magazine’s Man of the Year. That’s right, Hitler, Man of the Year. Meanwhile, concentration camps were opening up in Germany, the passports of Jews were being confiscated and their businesses being looted, the Holocaust had begun. The Munich Agreement saw Germany, Italy, France and Britain agree to the annexation of the Sudetenland/Czechoslovakia by Germany, without any say from the Czechs, thinking this would avert war. Neville Chamberlain arrived home, waving the signed papers, proclaiming, “Peace in our time !” Yeah, that didn’t happen. Instead, Mussolini began demanding France cede various ‘colonies’ to Italy, the Middle east was also being carved up, and the atomic age officially started when nuclear fission, using Uranium was first discovered that year.
Seeing any parallels yet ? Now we have refugee camps, passports being confiscated, new dictators, Ukraine, Syria, use of depleted uranium, the threat of nukes and world war for real, rearing it’s ugly head… Not making predictions, just noting that unfinished business has returned to collect and the tension is thick as black, Russian rye.

Comparing their charts, Putin trumps DT, and his crafty, Gemini Moon must give a sense of security or recognition to DT’s ‘no there there’ Sun. I’d have to agree that Trump makes a very excellent, Putinesque puppet. It’s a mutual, buddy-buddy relationship, sure, except that one of the buddies is not playing with a full deck, the other is a major, world player. A narcissist like DT with Mars and Pluto in the 12th is attracted to power like a fly to excrement and is therefore malleable. At the same time, he has a lot of power residue, left over from the past, and is an excellent manipulator himself, but he does not use it responsibly, he throws it about, inciting people to be their worst and attracting entities. The man is akin to a walking ear worm of your most hated song.

Well, less than 3 weeks to go…

Btw, Nov 9 in 1938 was ‘Kristallnacht’, the ‘night of broken glass’, in Germany, when Nazi activists and sympathizers spent the night on a rampage, burning and looting Jewish businesses and synagogues. We can likely expect some violence around this election – if he loses, there will be anger, rioting by those believing the results fixed… if he wins, there will be idiots who see it as permission to go on a racist rampage.

And now, back to the present…

Attack on US Congress, Jan 6, 2021 – either that upholstery goes or we do.

This just in…
A friend posted to FB this morning. Old footage of a Nazi rally at Madison Square Gardens, 1939, pieced together and cleaned up by director Marshall Curry. It seems hard to believe (although I’d heard of this event, before), but then, considering Hitler was TIME’s Man of the Year, just the year before, and the world had not yet seen the concentration camps, maybe not so hard. Please watch this 6 minutes of horror.

December 24, 2020February 4, 2021

Holly for Christmas

Trees are living Gods.

The sacred Holly is popular at this time of year because it is associated with the Green Man, Christ, truth and love. Holly is the Bach remedy for envy, jealousy, hatred, and helps to open the heart to compassion and generosity.

“In Celtic astrology, the eighth sign of the lunar zodiac is Holly and it’s ruling planet is Earth, because it marked the fire festival of Lammas or Lughnasa, which was celebrated on 1 August. These celebrations were in honour of their Earth goddess and their Sun god when the fruits of the earth were being harvested. The mystical symbol of the Holly Tree is the fabled Unicorn, an ancient symbol of royalty and noble spirit. The evergreen aspect of the Holly symbolized eternal life…”

~ Celtic Moon Signs, Helena Patterson

We have a lot of Holly in Vancouver, probably from Britain. I stood beside this one today, with the Taurus (earth) Moon above. Found a couple of small branches on the ground, to take home, and left a slightly heart-shaped, pink-tinted rock in it’s trunk, as a thank-you.

December 22, 2020February 4, 2021

Day After Solstice Jupiter and Saturn

Well, we finally got a clear evening, so I stood glued to the southwest horizon with opera glasses and pocket camera at the ready. Suddenly there they were…the two interpersonal planet Gods empowered in partnership. My photos are nothing fancy, but am so grateful I got to see this once in a lifetime event! Got me choked up, have to say.

December 21, 2020December 21, 2020

A Krampus Christmas Zodiac

Vintage Krampus postcards for the devil in every sign!
Saint Nicholas and Krampus…kind of has a Jupiter Saturn conjunction feel, doesn’t it? Chain-wielding, pagan devil Krampus, punishing the naughty, while ‘Santa’ dishes out rewards for faith and good karma.

krampus speeding on a sled — Aries Krampus

krampus on a broomstick full of babies — Cancer Krampus

krampus with people puppets — Leo Krampus

krampus partying with groovy chick — Libra Krampus

krampus and saint nicholas — Scorpio Krampus

giant krampus collecting people in a basket — Aquarius Krampus

kramus spanking a lady for her sins — Pisces Krampus

Happy Grand Conjunction Solstice, Merry Christmas to all !!

April 30, 2020February 11, 2024

Wakey Wakey!

Descartes denied that animals had reason or intelligence. He argued that animals did not lack sensations or perceptions, but these could be explained mechanistically. Whereas humans had a soul, or mind, and were able to feel pain and anxiety, animals by virtue of not having a soul could not feel pain or anxiety. If animals showed signs of distress then this was to protect the body from damage, but the innate state needed for them to suffer was absent. Although Descartes’ views were not universally accepted they became prominent in Europe and North America, allowing humans to treat animals with impunity. The view that animals were quite separate from humanity and merely machines allowed for the maltreatment of animals, and was sanctioned in law and societal norms. [Wikipedia]

Such cold, clinical mindset (which ignores the fact that we are animals and we feel) still pervades today, because progress depends on it, not because there is any truth to it.

Uranus was discovered in the 18th c, and along with the many scientific breakthroughs and discoveries, the shadow side was this overly-clinical, detached way of relating to other living ‘things’. Nature was no longer sacred, only the human soul was. Everything else was formula, which could be measured, dissected, categorized. Astrology was kicked of of astronomy, alchemy out of chemistry, and myth would become synonymous with ‘lie’. Doctors took over from midwives, magic became a sideshow act, as did people with physical deformities.
It’s no wonder there was a huge, spiritualist movement at the end of the 19th century. Perhaps this was indicative of another side of Uranus coming into play – the free thinker, telepath, prophet or astrologer who seeks to unify everything and who can ‘see the world in a grain of sand.’ The fin-de-ciecle of the 19th c also gave us Frankenstein and Dracula, metaphors for mad science/creation envy and inherent, human cannibalism (according to Guillermo del Toro).

Watch this excellent lecture series from UCLA on Science, Magic and Religion

The overwhelmingly positive response to the Queen’s simple and predictable address today, as Black Moon Lilith conjuncts the Sun, shows that many people are starved for the slightest bit of the sacred in their lives. Popular religion is often too abstracted, no longer bearing any resemblance to the natural cycles and phenomena it was originally inspired by.

I’m reminded of when Diana died in a car crash. People were weeping in part for the princess, but more deeply, I think, for the Goddess. Lilith’s destructiveness stems from the lunar Goddess’ rejection and the stripping of her ‘corona’ – the severing of her head/mental power source. This is more obvious in the myth of Medusa, whose head writhes with primordial serpent wisdom.

Looking at this corona virus (even the name) as a symbolic phenomenon, it is a symptom of our dislocation from the sacred, within and without. The lungs are where grief manifests, around the heart (Aquarius/Leo). Viruses are now thought to play role in our evolution, in changing our DNA. So this is also part of our birthing process.
Restoration of the sacred is something we can all take part in. We simply need to listen, become humble in the presence of nature, life, death and learn to live with reverence again – easy! – we are all indigenous to planet earth and this infinite universe.
The number 20 illustrates an ear and open orifice. Yes it is the Judgement calling card, but it is also through the ear (sound, vibration, frequency) that the holy spirit – the shape-making essence – is conceived.

Medical Definition of conception 1a : the process of becoming pregnant involving fertilization or implantation or both. b : embryo, fetus. 2a : the capacity, function, or process of forming or understanding ideas or abstractions or their symbols. b : a general idea. [Merriam Webster]

July 14, 2019April 5, 2024

Saturn on a Sunday

Saturn has been coming up as a topic for me, during this Mercury retrograde, I guess because of age, but also I have Saturn in the 3rd house, sexile my own Rx Mercury. Also it is my late father’s birthday, today. [Serendipitously, as I was writing this piece, some people began singing happy birthday, next door.]

Saturn can represent the father, or parent/grandparent/teacher that first enforces structure in our lives. I say ‘enforces’ because we have no choice in the matter. This can be for our protection, but it can also be to control us with or repress our natural expression, so, as we grow, we seek to redefine this outer structure that we didn’t create. Sometimes the repression can be quite severe, but Saturn is also the ‘karma lord,’ so somehow, somewhere, we must have had a hand in it and needed the lesson, if only to rebel against and thereby grow into ourselves.

The first Saturn return (around age 29) is often difficult because, though it is usually defined as our first ‘true’ initiation into adulthood, reality and responsibility, our unconscious urges are to break out of any left-over, imposed structure not of our own creation, that we have spent our teens and 20s rebelling against.

So part of us may still be modelling our ‘adult’ self on the old blueprints and part of us seeks to continually redraw them until we come up with something more authentic. (We may have had kids prior to the first Saturn return and discovered we ‘turned into our parents’ along the way). Usually by the second Saturn return we have had some TIME and experience to soul-search and let go of definitions that no longer apply to who we are, often during the ‘mid life crisis’ that is the Uranus opposition and Chiron return.

Aki Inomata hermit crab glass cathedral shell (photo from Fast Company)

It reminds me of the hermit crab (since we’re in Cancer season), who has to keep changing shells as it outgrows the old one, but who always needs a shell to protect it’s soft body. Sometimes it’s new shell is not a shell, but whatever material it finds fitting.
Saturn’s cycles are in sync with the progressed Moon’s, as well as the lunar nodes’ which makes sense, since these represent instinct, the soul urge/potential, emotional body, memory, etc.

In Tarot, the Tower is the old structure that is struck down, thereby releasing the prisoners. It is often associated with Uranus. Indeed, Uranus is the first planet situated beyond the boundaries of Saturn (Chiron orbits between the two and has been called the ‘Rainbow Bridge’). As 16, it is a ‘1/4’ card (every 4th card is also the 1st card of a new cycle of 3, thus having to do with change/transition, death and rebirth). This type of change is a blow, shock or awakening from without (well, the lightening is attracted to certain structures for a reason).
In the Moon card, we see two, less imposing towers, with an opening in between, for the soul’s watery emergence. They may well be bridge towers. The Moon is a ‘3’ card (a womb for new creative potential, from which the next cycle is born). Since the Moon controls the tides of life, and the body of water that provides it, we can equate this with the soul forming and reshaping matter. Just look at beach glass, driftwood, etc. This type of change is a slow, but synchronized metamorphosis from within, that can be quite mysterious.

Saturn ultimately knows that in time, all structures will be changed, somehow. But the key word here is TIME. Patience, continued effort…there are no mistakes, no punishment, it’s all a process of becoming.

WW2 Defense Barrier with new graffiti, London [photo © Kevin Harrison]

Meanwhile, Neptune in Pisces tides are wearing down our old preconceptions and washing away the footprints in the sand left by the Piscean Age. Things are cracking open. The Earth itself is changing, her waters rising, her crust shifting. It’s up to each and every one of us to use this opportunity to create new space for becoming who we really are, from within. Only we can change ourselves so that the old structures have no foundation to be re-built on.

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